Self-ownership and respect for others

I don’t write much about my experiences with Miriam, unschooling your second child is alot easier than the first, I don’t think so much I just do.

Lately I have been teaching the kids about self ownership, inspired by some things I’ve read on Free Your Kids, it goes something like this:
Me: Who owns your body?
Kid: I do!
Me: What do you do if somebody does something to you that you don’t like?
Kid: I say no!
Me: And if they don’t listen?
Kid: I tell my parents!

Funny thing is, first time I did it, they knew all the answers without ever being taught, but I can still tell that they benefit from having it vocabularised.

These days we are visiting Oma (the childrens paternal grandma). She is sick and needs our help. Well she needs my husband and my husband needs to be with his family, so we came with him – one of the perks of homeschooling. Oma sits most of the day in her high backed armchair. Miriam plays around her, and on her. Oma likes that most of the time. Miriam brings her toys and puts them on Omas lap and talks about them. This amuses Oma, and the two of them gets along really well. But then today Miriam takes her cleaning waggon (a miniture copy of the ones cleaning ladies have) and puts it on Omas lap: it’s too much. Oma kindly says no, it’s to heavy for me, please take it down. And Miriam breaks down, she cries, she throws her self under the table, she is devastated.

I walk up to her, cuddle her, comfort her and talk to her about how she wanted to share the waggon with Oma, and she calms down a little. Then I ask her: to whom do your body belong? She lokks up and points at herself. And I proceed: To whom does Omas body belong? She looks at me, a little annoyed, then says “Oma”. And if someone does something to Oma that she doesn’t like? “Say no” she replies… “And Lucas and Daddys bodies too” she says.


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